Monday, December 14, 2009

It's late,

but I have to write another post.

There are so many thoughts running my mind right now... Actually, more like one main thought that seems to be spreading throughout my brain... my mind... my body. It's spreading like one deadly tumor.

The thought: What's my future?

So many burdens, so many stresses right now. More than I realized. I didn't realize how much I am actually worried about this because I play it down. I play down the fact that the dietetic internship application process is hardcore and that the internship programs offered throughout the country are highly selective. I play down the fact that I may not be accepted into an internship program.

I know I'm laidback and all, but I know for a fact that I am also a perfectionist, an "all or nothing" type of gal. Not getting into a dietetic internship would affect me. A lot. At least for a teeny while, I'll feel like a failure.

I know for a fact that God has a wonderful plan for me and that His timing is by far greater than any of ours, but still, I'm human, and I know I can't help but feel a certain way when the time comes. I'll either be ecstatic or depressed. Two responses. Well, I'm going to write this to remind myself: A person has a choice in everything. I can choose to respond to the future with apprehension or with eagerness. I'd rather choose the latter. Lord, in Your mercy, give me that faith!!!

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